I hit MY wall....

So after yesterdays update and I went back to the hospital we had a fairly good day....Ray's parents reported that he was able to "go" multiple times during the day had gone a good distance in his hall had a decent meal and had been a good boy with his breathing exercises! (This morning no crackling sounds!! We are too keep up the good work!) He also had some great visitors....Mike N came and he said it was good to have him there and feel his peace. He had 3 HS friends come and that was another boost to hear them reminisce of days gone by. We went for a walk and he lapped the hall to the half way part!! Amazing! All was looking good and the pain meds made him more lucid!!! We did have a downer part his surgical leg started to swell. We noticed it and Ray really felt it...most of the swelling was knee up to pelvis. They called Dr. Scott and he didn't seem too concerned since there was no fever present, no redness...so he told them he would check it at rounds in the morning and let him know if it changed. My tears resurfaced yesterday....I hadn't really had much tears since the night this all started on the 10th.....I had cried them out and was the strong one again.....but BAM! I had them yesterday....it was one of those days that even a stinking diaper commercial could bring them on. I know I am sleep deprived, stressed over medical bills, stressed over living expenses, and worried over Ray's long term prognosis.....so I guess I am allowed a little eye leakage now and then right??? Last night was better then any of them yet. Although little sleep on either part (not good on the leaky eye syndrome I have acquired again!) due to he went to the bathroom every hour and the leg throbbed a little more.....but I tried my best to help Ray and his apology to me in the middle of the night that I had to go through all this brought silent tears again (good thing it was dark) He doesn't like it when his words cause tears. So it was emotional and draining....fast forward to rounds this morning. Dr. Scott was a little more worried of the leg it is really puffy...he could push his fingers in the skin deep and the depressions would stay a long time! Ray's labs did show he is low on blood again.....Dr. was kinda at a loss as to where its going.....no obvious oozing from the leg and the drain tubes haven't needed to be emptied in over 24 hours. So, next plan for today obviously not coming home :o( He will be having another transfusion....He will be scheduled for an ultrasound to look for blood clots in the leg...and an MRI on the pelvis to check for a possible tumor. Before I came home they did get the ultrasound done and the tech said it looked good. No blood clot....no time was set yet for the MRI.....so tick tock tick tock waiting again.....I have a few funny moments but right now I don't feel like doing the funny stuff....I'll post again with them....I don't want to sound selfish...but today I could use and extra prayer or two :o)

Until the next post......

Loves.....