My personal lowest week yet...

Ok....so to bring everyone up to speed....We had a few deadlines we had to meet.....Ray had to be back to work no later then November 17th (Our FMLA ran out....if not back by then...no job...no benefits) Dr. Scott reluctantly gave a note (Ray had to follow it to a "T") only one run per day and no lifting and no carrying things. He is still only supposed to put 50% of his weight on the leg and is still on a crutch (we are hoping to purchase a cane soon when we have the money) So Ray goes in to work and they said they weren't too sure of him driving with those type of restrictions. They wanted to check with risk management. So he was sent home that day. BUT the miracle part of that is....the next day they had some "office" work for him to do. Just a few weeks prior they had gotten a new computer system and they are behind inputting all the paperwork. (ever hear the saying when a door closes the Lord opens a window??? HERE is one of those times!) We don't know how long he will have this opportunity BUT it gives him something to do....gives us a little more income (which is so desperately needed! It is so hard to ask for help from family, ask for charity, etc....but without it we would be far worse off!) Ray and I have worried horribly about bills....our mortgage is still too far behind.....and with the holidays it was even more worrisome for the girls...but again we have had SO MANY miracles on our behalf.....I wanted to personal thank all those again who have sacrificed and provided for our family (even those anonymously!!) Ok....that upbeat part done.....Now to the doom and gloom...(and the lowest of the lows) Ray had his CT scan a couple of weeks ago. (They did chest, abdomen, and leg) Ray and I knew when Dr. Ott asked for both of us to be on the phone that wasn't good.....The upper part is clean as a whistle!!! But there was a "spot" that Dr. Ott said showed up on the leg. And since he is not the Ortho Oncologist he referred us back to Dr. Scott. We called their office (they are in the same building as Dr. Ott) told them that the CT was available to view online (isn't modern technology wonderful!) Lani said she would have Dr. Scott look at it then let us know. Well a couple hours later she called and asked when our next appointment was....we said December 16th...she said...well lets get you in now to discuss options....both Ray and I knew things were even worse then we could imagine....So two days later we went in...Us, Ray's parents, and Ray's two older girls....we all sat in the room and heard the news.....Yes there was a tumor :o( Dr. Scott had seen a spot on his Xray in September...but didn't want to have anything else stress Ray out while the healing from the surgery was so critical, so he was going to watch it. The scary part is...it was NOT there in the end of July.....and since the September Xray has grown quite rapidly so its a more aggressive tumor. This one is located ABOVE the cadaver bone just under the knee cap on the tibia. There is also another "spot" but he is unsure if this is a tumor or not...it may be caused from his rod in the tibia moving....Ray always said he could feel something moving (I thought he was crazy...but Dr. Scott says it is entirely possible) and it is STILL not healed...it has a definite black line all the way between Ray's bone and the cadaver bone....Ok...so.....options......One...is to do a "quick fix" that may or may not get all the tumor/cells out....picture it like a cavity....Dr. Scott would go in...drill out the tumor and use nitrogen to "freeze" the cells...he says the nitrogen goes in about 1mm into the bone...then he would fill it with bone cement. OH and also at that same time he would put another screw in and a plate to help the rod not move so much and "scrunch" the two bone (Ray's and the cadaver) together....Two....amputation....(I don't even know where to begin with this).....Three.....nothing...we just let it run its course.....BUT all this is depending on the complete body bone scan. If there is any more new hot spots....we will not be treating anything. We know this tumor is resistant to radiation (since he was getting radiation to the area) but Ray still isn't a great candidate for chemo.....WHEW....I tell you....we both just wanted to crawl under a palm tree in the Caribbean and forget life for awhile! So the only thing for sure that I know to tell you is that....we are not making a definite decision till after the bone scan...we call on Monday to set that up.....Ok....I am an emotional wreck again to typing this...Please continue to pray for Ray, the girls, me and our Dr's. So we may be guiding to know the right paths. Love to you all!

Radiation Graduation!!!!

WHEW I think I am finally getting this blog and our family blog caught up!!! Well as you can tell from the title.....Ray had his LAST radiation treatment!!! I am amazed at this...sometimes it felt like we had be going forever...and now that it is over...its like WOW were did those 6 weeks go....or that's right...radiation and PT! :o) We made some great friends through radiation. Some we only met and knew by face or type of cancer and treatment. Others we became dear friends with....and the staff became the vital part of each treatment for Ray...without their laughter and love he would not have made it! So for his last day we checked the girls out of school and took them with us....we took some donuts...(some of Ray's fav's) and went and celebrated! Afterwards we even treated ourselves to Olive Garden.....(we really had to get creative on the finances for that trip!) But it was worth it! Ray has had an incredibly hard road and this is another small success that must be appreciated, honored, and most of all gratitude to Heavenly Father for this blessing! Ray is still struggling with PT. We have found out that most likely he is capped out at what his function on the foot is....we will continue with PT to try and help with the still ever persistent edema. Our PT talked to Dr. Scott and it looks like Ray will be in the boot and on crutches for another 2 months (at the very least) so we are concerned with the end of FMLA coming up and the possible side effects from that. Please continue to pray for us.....We love you all!!

Ray's LAST "walk" from the treatment room! Wahoo!

Everything is better with a donut involved!

The girls eating their dessert before Olive Garden....life is even better when dessert comes first!

Ray and Courtney ringing the bell together!

Ray's certificate......WAY TO GO honey! I am so proud of you!
Some of the wonderful staff! Kimberlee, January, Natalie...we missed Carolann that day :o(

A special moment with a special friend...

I seriously haven't blogged a lot since Ray started his radiation and we are NOW done (that story to follow)....so sorry to my faithful followers! Well a few Tuesdays ago we had a jam packed day of Dr's. We took the girls out of school. Courtney had another follow up for her stomach issues at the pediatrician. The meds she is on helped these past 3 weeks but still not enough....so her Dr. upped the dose. We also did a well child exam. She is really healthy! And the nurse was astounded at her eyesight...it is 20/13!!! BOTH eyes! She says she never sees it in kids and only occasionally in teens! If the old wives tale proves right...it must be all the carrots she likes to eat! :o) She was also put on a VERY small dose of Prozac. (Yes we know the risks and don't plan it long term, but with careful consideration and advise from the pediatrician we think this is the best step right now) So hopefully it will help within a couple of weeks. So then we took the girls for the 1st time to Ray's radiation treatment. The girls were full of questions and the always helpful and friendly staff were very accommodating. After his treatment was done the girls got to go into the room where it is done and use the controls to lower his bed and help him off....they thought that was the BEST! We followed with a dentist appointment for me! WHEW! I was done and ready for home after that! But we had a dance class for Cami then FINALLY it was home to catch up on homework!



So as we continue Ray's radiation treatments we get to build relationships with the not only the staff, but those who are scheduled around Ray's time (the treatments happened the same time each day for each patient) The lady before Ray, Catherine became particularly dear to me! It was one of those moments when an instant connection clicked! She is battling breast cancer and was very helpful in answering questions and calming our fears as a newer patient. We saw her each day...Well this past Wednesday was her very last day of treatment! So we wanted to surprise her with a little something. It turned out really nice! We (on the sly) found out she liked carrot cake so we got her a cake. And Tory and Sarah found the perfectly pink fabric that had hearts and the breast cancer awareness ribbons and made her a no sew blanket. We wanted to send her off with our love and wishes for a full remission! We will miss seeing her daily but so glad she had accomplished this and gets to move on! She also surprised us with a VERY generous gift certificate for some good comfort food! We exchanged email addresses and phone numbers so hopefully we keep in close contact! My prayer that is always in my heart may we find a cure for cancer soon so everyone in the world will no longer suffer. And families don't have to see their loved ones suffer.

We walked around the corner to the room and saw Ray HIGH up in the air on the bed (I didn't even know he went up that high!)

A quick rundown on the controlsAnd a down he goes!They took turns!! The yummy but OH SO SWEET carrot cake!
Catherine, Ray, and the blankie! Ringing the bell for her graduation from radiation!!

I have lacked I know...

When I was at church today I had several people ask about the blog....and a few weeks before that I had more people inquire. I am sorry for not updating this more regular. We have had lots going on so yes there should have been some updates...but for some reason lately I have been down.....I have felt no motivation, no desire to do extra....and in fact I have been hard pressed to do the bare minimum. I have updated our regular family blog for the most part...so that said let me get you caught up....Ray's radiation treatments are in FULL swing....in fact we only have 2 more weeks worth left! In the very beginning it was going fine....then Ray hit the point of feeling it all! He is exhausted, in more pain (if you can imagine that), has severe edema, and as of a few days ago he is starting to get blistering on his leg. I don't know if the radiation is causing his stomach issues...but those have increased numerously as well. We do reflect though on our blessings. We have met some great people at radiation (remember we go at the same time each day and get to bond with the other patients) I will have a separate post on a sweet lady we met. Ray loves giving the staff something to laugh about each day. And as we learn of the others and their own struggles we can't help but to get down on our knees and thank the Lord for helping us through ours! Some of them have such a greater trial then Ray does. Another step that is on Ray's horizon is PT (Physical Therapy). We had our initial intake appointment with our therapist. It was eye opening....Ray has a LONG ways to go....he has great knee mobility but on the ankle he has little to none. For example the motion of point/flex of the foot he is supposed to have a radius of approximately 45 degrees he has SIX!!! The others are better but not by much. Right now he is scheduled 2 times a day at PT with daily at home exercises...it will increase as he is able to. I really hope to keep you better informed....I know its frustrating on the outside wanting to help, wanting to keep us up and just not getting enough details. As always we are forever grateful for the never ending prayers on our behalf. The sweet letters, the anonymous donations, the phone calls, and all other support. May the Lord bless you ten fold!

One step er I mean hop forward...

Ok so Ray is working on apply 50# of pressure on his foot....not an easy task...its SO tender! We also went to our Radiation Oncologist Dr. Thomson. They did his intact evaluation. Got him tattooed....Yep I am now married to a man with tattoo's! Whoulda thunk it?? :o) They are 5 VERY VERY small bluish dots...this is so the radiation machine laser will line it up exactly each time! Our first appointment for treatment is this coming Wednesday...we will have a "dry run" then an actually treatment. Then he will go Monday-Friday same time each day. Dr. Thomson has decided to lengthen his days of treatment but lessen the amount each time to make it a little easier on Ray's body. The office he practices at is amazing! I got to see how they interact with patients while Ray was in CT. They are very personally involved and I got to experience a lady who was having her LAST treatment! They have this HUGE bell hung in the hall that is the celebration bell and she got to ring it hard and loud! They also gave her a lei and a certificate of completion! All very loving! I guess if someone has to go through this....this is the place to be! Ray also went to his primary care doctor. Ray's sleeping has been getting worse and worse.....so we found a new sleeping pill and so far so good! He sleeps over 5 hours!!! That should go a long way in helping him heal I hope! So please keep your support and prayers coming his way! Its gonna be another long month and a half! Love to you all!

It's a KEEPER!

So we had Ray's doctor's appointment with Dr. Scott today and it looks like we dodged another bullet! Amputation looks like it will pass over the Wojtasek household!! So what else went on??......X-ray...CHECK....Cast removed....CHECK.....foot soak in warm water.....CHECK....a mini scrub with wash cloth...CHECK....select color for new cast...CHECK.....new cast on.....CH....awww not so fast! We are in a boot baby!!! Ray can actually shower normally!!! The X-ray looked good....well the important part that is! Down where the ankle/foot connects with the leg there was a little "fuzz" You wanna know what....this time the FUZZ is GOOD! Who knew I'd like the word fuzz! That indicates the healing!!! The upper part ironically is NOT healing....but Dr. Scott dismissed that with a "I'm not concerned with that....if that part doesn't heal I can go back in and correct it" "The part that was a MUST, is showing signs!" So what does this mean??? Well for starters...the BOOT....Ray can take it off now and then to let his leg "breathe" he can also shower without restrictions (well besides no weight-bearing....still has his companion of the "crunches") He is to now "practice" putting weight on his leg (ONLY WHEN IN THE BOOT) on the bathroom scale and work towards 50lbs these next two weeks....then increase it 10lbs a week...each week after that. So Ray and Dr. Scott had a funny conversation at this point....Ray was doing his quick calculations of the weight bearing and we knew we were following up with Dr. Scott in 4 weeks (this was discussed prior to this conversation) so Ray said "So by the next time I see you...lets see...50 pounds week 1 & 2...then 60 pounds then 70!" Without skipping a beat Dr. Scott said "So I guess that means you will be walking with ALL your body weight bearing!" We all loved it and laughed at that....but then Ray and I had that look between the two of us....That it hits too close to the truth! But we are proud to report Ray did gain TWO pounds!!
We also got the go ahead to start the radiation....now this is bittersweet....it could make Ray more tired and healing ground to a halt...but it will be monitored and it is a step FORWARD! We also talked with Dr. Scott about a possible return to work....and barring any major set backs due to radiation or a recurrence....Its possible by Thanksgiving!!!! WOW! We know we still have major hurdles....and will continue to be tried....money (or lack there of) continues to be a huge issue...but we are blessed beyond measure!!! Oh and also yesterday we heard from Dr. Staskus...and Ray's lab to check for the Insilinoma...was at a .01....No Insilinoma tumor!! Yahoo! I have also included a few pictures for your for lack of better words enjoyment :o) Thanks again to all those who send love, prayers and well wishes...we are also still being blessed with some financial help from family, friends and even the anonymous...if this includes you....THANK YOU!

Love from us to you all....till next time!

A shot??? A blood draw??? Surgery???Bad news??? A smashed toe???Nope....Ray's nerves as he was having his cast cut off :o) Look at this sexy leg!!! NO REDNESS! We still have some dead/black skin but minor!!A look at his NOT so sexy heal! It needs some TLC!! A basin of Heaven! Warm water soak!

Peek A Boo....don't faint....I am updating!

WOW...I looked at the blog and realized it has been since Aug 30th since I last posted....Let me start with a HUGE "I'm sorry!" I know how many of you depend on this to get the updates on Ray...If I for one was on the OTHER end of this I'd be antsy for some info....But in defense of myself....I have been DEAD tired (oops maybe not the best term to use) Being back to work (albeit not many hours) having the kids up and going to school (one willing, one NOT so willing) homework, housework, repeat has taken a toll on me. So literally I have not felt like blogging (which in itself should indicate how stressed I am.....normally I LOVE TO BLOG!!!) Ok that said....I will give you some updates and fill you in.

We have had the run of the mill usual stuff with Ray. His pain management is going well. The annoyance of the slow healing process is aggravating and STRESSFUL! We are still in the "unknown" areas of things. We could still be looking at amputation. So we pray daily that we get improvement! (Thanks to all those who also do it on our behalf!) He H-A-T-E-S the cast, its awkward, heavy, itchy and its starting to smell! He is so agile though with crutches and hopping around....he even helps with the housework (so he doesn't go nuts) he even VACUUMS!! He is cute hopping around pushing the vacuum and using one crutch. He amazes me! We are still battling the low blood sugars. We finally made it to our old endocrinologist (the bad part since she is out of network and we can't get into our "in" network one till November...we have to pay for the WHOLE visit) :o( But we do like her. She adjusted his insulin both Lantus (24 long acting) and Novolog (sliding scale PRN) and is doing a test. She is looking for another type of tumor called an Insolinoma (a tumor that secretes insulin) we should hear back from this shortly. Also she would like Ray to have a genetic test done if this shows positive. Supposedly this type of tumor can be passed on from parent to child. If the genetic lab is positive then all the girls will need to be tested to see if they inherited the gene responsible for that. WHEW....what else, like we need more!!! Also we had another "date" with the paramedics and ambulance and police officers! Monday night (Labor Day) I had just gotten the girls to sleep in their beds and was talking to Ray from the balcony. I asked him if he was ok. He responding with a very rude "I'm fine" (soooo not like Ray) so I came down and felt him. He was sweating profusely and seeming confused a bit AND ornery! So I told him to check his blood sugar and headed to the kitchen for juice...I returned with juice and he had still not got the blood sugar monitor out. I asked 2 more times and kept getting the agitated "I'm fine" response finally I did it myself it said "LOW" which means under 20 (remember normal is 80-140!) at 20 unconsciousness, seizure and death can result! I got the drink in him (barely!) he was loopy and aggressive and then he started the twitching. I called Brek and Mike (sorry so late guys but thanks for running right over!!) Brek tried to get more juice in him and we collectively decided to call 911...he was now not conscious and have seizures. I handled myself well this time...no break downs....no hyperventilating....thanks again Noice's for being there! The police officers arrived 1st. I had the glucagone mixed and read...but they told me to hold off until the paramedics arrived. Once they arrived they tested his blood sugar again and it was still under 20....so they put some "gel-like" glucose in his mouth at the side of his cheek and I had a PB and J sandwich prepared...He finally came around....the first thing he asked was "What happened to my game???" I had turned off the Boise St./Virginia Tech game....that made us all laugh.....and then the next thing he was worried about was his appearance.....he wanted a blanket to cover his undies! Then the mystery of sorts was discovered. While we waited for the paramedics to arrive Brek kept trying to have Ray drink and talk to him....and she kept saying "I think he is trying to tell me something but he can't talk" So then when he was more coherent. He told Brek "I was trying to tell you to get your COLD hands off me!" We laughed again on that! So since we didn't administer the glucagon we didn't have to make a trip to the hospital. And the good part of this stressful night (The girls slept through ALL the commotion!!!) So we are still closely monitoring it. We also have a Dr.'s appointment on Tuesday for another xray and follow up on the leg. Ray is looking forward to having the cast off (even though its only for xraying purposes) at least I can rub it for a few minutes!!! Then the new (stinky free one) goes on! I also need to schedule a Dr. appointment for Courtney....she constantly has a stomach ache (I am sure stress related) and the liquid Maalox helps....so we need her on a stronger antacid RX.

Money woes are here and I believe we are going to have to be more humbled and ask for help and such......the blessing in that aspect though is that Ray's FMLA was supposed to be done in October but due to the merger of his company they were not caught up on paper work and when we got his FMLA papers he has his job secured till November!!!! Blessings!!! Its hard though...its all without pay....AND we have to cover both sides of the insurance premium! ARGH! We need to go to an island and forget our troubles for just a few days! Whew....ok enough complaining. We are grateful! We are blessed beyond measure. And we know the Lord is mindful of us and supporting our way spiritually through all this! Thanks again for the constant prayers and thoughts on our behalf. We love you family and friends!

Weekend in Review....

Well Friday ending up being a re-coop day for Ray.....his leg was pretty swollen from Thursday's excursion.....Friday early eve both girls had play dates...so I got Ray settled then picked up a red box and little Cesar's for the girls and we relaxed Friday night. It was so good for both Ray and I (well actually the girls too) to not have to set an alarm for the next morning stay up a tad later and just "be bums" On Saturday Ray went to his nephews 1st football game with his folks...It was SO windy for him and he said he had to walk a LONG ways to the field...but he had fun....but after he got done with that we were going to stay at my Mom's for a bit (game day!) but I ended up taking Ray home after a couple of hours...he needed R-E-S-T!!! The next day that is what we did! We didn't do ANYTHING beyond playing some games with the girls and then getting outside for the "usual" meeting of the rectangle families! So things are still going ok. Sleep is off or on......Last night Ray slept from 9:30p till almost 4am!!! That was heaven to us all! Those nights are few and far between! Today was back to school and work...I like my time at work and being with the kids but I liked the summer care free'ish days when I got to run on Ray's schedule better...if I had a rough night with him...I was more apt to get a nap at some point during the day...not much of that now. Oh well :o) Ray still isn't really liking his cast...its awkward and heavy.....its harder to move about and sleep with too. We still hae major days of depressions and with all the "What if's", MONEY...and when do we worry about work....yada yada yada.....its just so mentally exhausting for Ray and I...but we know we are blessed and tell each other sometimes on a hourly basis how much we love each other and feel the strength of the other pulling us through a particularly tough time. Its amazing what trial can do for a marriage! I love you Ray and my heart aches for you and I pray each day we see some light!

Awwww Friday!

We have had an ok few days....Ray describes it best when people ask him how he is doing "Some moments are great and then it can change in an instant" Its so true...we never know what the day or even HOUR will bring. Ray is continuing to improve albeit VERY slowly....He is still trying to adjust to the weight of the cast....His analogy is that he knows what those who were giving "cement shoes" by the mafia feel like! And sometimes he says he feels like he is sinking to the ocean. Yesterday he did something grand! Since I was going to work a little longer today he decided to take Frontrunner to his parents....I went with him to the loading platform made sure he got on the train ok...and his parents picked him up at the Ogden depot. He and I were both nervous but it turned out GREAT! He had a nice day with his parents and brother and was a much needed change of venue!!! Then that afternoon he rode back and I picked up back up! It will be a regular thing I think...as long as he feels up to it....on the good mornings this is the thing to do...I guess if he has a bad afternoon and can't return via train we can always pick him up after work/school. We had a mix up with Ray's sleeping pills and the pharmacy....so he had to go last night without them....He didn't think they really helped....OH BOY...yes they do...He got little to none sleep last night! Poor guy....maybe he can catch a nap or two today. Well that's it for now...Hope all is well with you all. HUGS!

Tuesday Date Day...

So Ray and I had our usual Tuesday date (with Dr. Scott!) This one was later in the afternoon (a little more stressful for Ray to wait and think about it all day...but with me working its easier on me and my work) they were very prompt as usual! Lani came right in and removed the dressing and half cast....Ray had already asked me to be in a prime visual spot to look at the leg. (He was reading my reaction) It looked a little better. Not as great of a change from post op week 1 to week 2 but at least its still moving in the right direction! The swelling was better too! The leg was way down and slight improvement in the foot (you could even tell he still has an ankle....although it still looks like a "cankle" :o) Ray heads off to X-ray....after he returns he asks me point blank again if it is improved. I said yes (it took a little convincing for him to be sure I was giving it to him straight up!) So then Dr. Scott comes in...he thinks it looks great too! Everything is still lining up on the X-ray.....not much change....but that's good we are not going backwards. I asked a couple of questions about the leg...1. What was the black spots on and around his incision area....at first look I thought it was dried blood...but as I got closer to it, it had tissue like substance to it...they explained it was dead skin....(DON'T be alarmed) he only has 3 minor/small areas of it. and its normal due to trauma in the area. 2. Ray has this "bump" on his shin again.....I asked Dr. Scott about it....he said..."Well its not the plates (to high) its not the pins (wrong area) He said it could be a tumor growing (unlikely) but in any case we will keep a close eye on it. Nothing is showing up in the bone per Xrays....but X-ray can't rule out things in the tissue. So Dr. Scott decided it was time to CAST the leg!!! Out came the remaining staples....and on goes a RED cast!!! (Ray tried to cover all areas with the red color...Husker Football, U of U supporter, Bountiful Braves supporter and last but not least WPA support (they are RED, white and blue!) The plan is to wear this cast for 3 weeks...then they will reevaluate again with a new X ray and POSSIBLY start a little weight bearing in about 4 weeks! Will possible radiation to follow! We felt blessed to hear such good news...but on the other hand we are stressed....Ray's 12 week FMLA will be up before this all comes about....so the job we just don't know yet.....but will the Lord's blessings we WILL make it through whatever trials we have to endure.

Ok on a lighter note....we think its time we name the "donor" bone in his leg....so when its acting up instead of saying "Awww my leg hurts" he could say "Awww (feel in the name) is giving me a hard time" etc.....we feel it should be a woman's name (for some reason we think is a woman cadaver bone)....and unique...Bertha? Matilda etc...we are looking to YOU for suggestions! Leave a comment if you have a name idea!

Keep in touch for the next update......

A last fling.....

It was our last weekend before school starts and since we have had so much hospital time, doctor visits etc this summer.....we really haven't done anything with the kids. (Thank heavens my Sister, Dad & Mom kept them doing fun things so they weren't bored) anywho....it was our ward camp out last Friday night. Back in May (before any of this medical nightmare unfolded) we booked a motel room in Heber (only 26 miles from the camp out) Ray needs access to our own facilities and lets face it...I HATE camping! We had done an Internet special price which was non refundable....so fast forward till now.....we decided to try it and even if we didn't spend much time at the camp out the girls could swim and have a mini staycation. So since we had a paid room we did it! It turned out fine......The ride to the camp spot was on the brink of TOO much for Ray...it was a lot of dirt, winding, rutted roads.....not very sensitive to a sore leg. But we made it....we enjoyed about 2 1/2 hours and made it to catch a bite of dinner but then he had had it.....he was such a trooper and he so enjoyed seeing everyone and talking! The girls did ok too....then we headed back to Heber and swam to the girls hearts content...I swam some too...and Ray laid in a lounge chair poolside with his foot up and watched the girls giggle and have fun! We even had a late check out so it was a repeat in the morning too! Ray slept so sound Friday night....we all did....I think from his exertion, the bed was comfy, and the black out drapes...we all slept till 8am!! We came home to have some more fun with the rectangle family. The Neff's had rented a HUGE/TALL slip and slide bounce house....Ray enjoyed chatting with every one there too! Then last night he had another GREAT night sleep!!! I think the 2 sleeping pills and now in his system more have been a great move! The leg is slowly healing and not requiring so much pain meds (I was always in awe of how much he was taking and the Dr. kept assuring us it was REALLY needed!) Now we are still working on his sugars...but all in all a great way to spend a final weekend together!

P.S. I just wanted to write to Ray and tell him Happy Birthday....he celebrates his 46th birthday today!! From when all this cancer battle started in 2007 we both wondered which birthday would be his last....and strive to make each day count! I love you Ray....you are amazing....your strength is unwavering....your faith strong as they come....your loyalty to family and friends undying....you are an inspiration to me (an everyone who knows you!) Your a great Dad and husband and friend...I am honored to have you in my life and will give my all to helping you fight and achieve when you want in life! I LOVE YOU!

A rested morning...

This morning Ray and I were talking and it was a pleasant surprise to find that we both almost woke feeling rested! Ray was able to stay in bed from 10p to 2am (with only 1 nature break) then he slept fairly well down in the recliner from 3am till about 6am!!! This hasn't happened in a long while!!! I slept in there two....but I had two companions in bed on and off through out the night...if it wasn't one it was the other and sometimes double duty!! Ray and I have to realized and have patience with them because all this affects them too! Ray also said he feels his swelling has gone down even MORE! Yahoo!!! The true test will be at the Dr. on Tuesday again!!! We got that name of the new endocrinologist and made an appointment....wanna take a guess of when it is????? NOVEMBER 8th! Sheesh.....but if Dr. Ott says she's worth the wait we jumped on board! Since Ray needed to see an endocrinologist sooner we made an appointment with our old one (from the old insurance) she can get us in A LOT sooner but it means a little more out of pocket....but when it comes to Ray....no expense is too great! We see her in 2 weeks. We ourselves have been working hard on adjusting the insulin a bit and I am happy to report we have been in the low 100's for a reading or two! WAHOO!!! So life is moving (baby steps forward) and we just pray daily that the backwards steps (we know we will have several) won't outnumber the forward ones. Hugs to each and everyone of you who continue to support and help us! We wanted to give a great shout out to Laurie W and her family for providing such a D'lish dinner of meatball sandwiches last night! (they were homemade and YUMMY!!) Thanks so much Laurie!!!

A wind in our sails....

So this past Tuesday we went back to Dr. Scott. They unwrapped the half cast....and I think all 3 of us (Dr. Scott, Lani & I) gasped....of course Ray wasn't looking!!! :o) Then Dr. Scott said "Wow what a difference!" And he was right! Its was a 100% better then the week before! He leg is starting to look its regular color, it had MINOR redness along the incision and FAR less drainage...no gray or blackness to it like last week....not intense red and purple like before! It was amazing. Dr. Scott then said that he was encouraged because he knew from our visit last week that his leg would go one way or the other without much room in the middle....he figured it would be amazing results or catastrophic in its demise. Now I want to stress we are NOT out of the woods yet...but the outside healing is one step that we needed to hurdle! Ray was the topic (again) of the Tuesday Tumor Conference. Dr. Scott, Dr. Ott, and Dr. Thomson (all of Ray's doctors) and several others discussed Ray's case and his status (again) Ray was the topic many a Tuesday's at this weekly conference. The biggest decision that was made there was that Ray will NOT do chemo.....they know with his fragility and weight (or lack there of) although it may kill the cancer, it would also in all probability kill him too. So the plan is radiation even though it may not kill it completely.....BUT this is all still a mute point if Ray's ankle/foot.....bone/metal combo heal...its still a concern....and very precarious....if it doesn't not heal he reiterated that the next step is amputation. We also are still struggling with Ray's extreme low blood sugar and lack of sleep.....He has had readings of the blood sugar in the 30's and below 20 remember it should be 80-120!!! This can cause seizures, unconsciousness, incoherent and even death so we are constantly on guard for this. On Tuesday we also saw Dr. Ott (remember we have the Ott/Scott team!) He gave us the "go to" gal for our new endocrinologist ...we will be making an appointment with her. So after looking at the leg and and having the talk of all the new info they removed the stitches and EVERY OTHER staple....so we started with 42 and are down by half!! Next week same thing....Tuesday appointment to check healing....oh yeah and the swelling is down...but not enough for casting....we will see for next week! Ray and I feel better...we had a great heart to heart talk on the way home and the rest of the day.......We both agreed on the chemo and both expressed our fears that we both thought Ray shouldn't have had the chemo anyway...its just feels good to hear the medical team say that as well....We don't know what lies ahead with us and Ray's prognosis yet....but we are blessed tremendously!! We have a strong support system of family and friends...and of course we have Heavenly Father's unending love and support! Thanks again to all! We love you! I also wanted to let Ray know how much I love him. I have an unyielding love for him....and will gladly walk hand in hand with him through any trial! Hugs to you all!

See the healthy looking skin!!!

No sleep...but Hot water!

Ok I know its been a few days since I last blogged but I feel like a broken record ;o) Ray is about the same....we think we might have a tad less swelling in the foot....its hard to tell when its under wraps!!! But he feels like he can move his ankle a bit around where previously he could not. He is hardly sleeping at night (not good) So luckily he catches cat naps throughout the day still. We tried a new method on the sleeping pills and instead of taking them right before bed...we let him go to sleep first and then when he wakes up at his normal 1st time (body seems to wake up about 1am) then we gave it to him. Did it work??? NOPE! In fact it was probably slightly worse.... :o( His blood sugar also is a constant battle today we have had low 30's AND one so low it didn't register (below 20) that means he is at risk for those seizures still. We keep a close watch on him and adjust accordingly. Tonight we are going to have a FHE on how to use 911 and discuss things that way with the kids in case the need arises it won't be such a scary thing to call. Kinda go over the things that the girls might need to answer....review our address again and such. We have had an emotional weekend...with some highs and lows. We had a nice chat with the Bishop...that helped a lot. We had another anonymous $100 dollars delivered to us! If you who generously gave that reads this....Thank you SO much! It means a lot to us and helps us out tremendously!!! Today we also had a new water heater installed thanks to Freestone Plumbing and heating!!! You guys were so generous to us! If anyone is in need of plumbing and heating services look to them...They are AMAZING!!! We go to the doctor tomorrow so hopefully we have a lot of progress to report!! We love you all and feel each and every prayer said on our behalf!

A Couple Days Of......

So since the last blog we have had 2 days of just so-so......The Ambien seems to not help much like it did the first night....he had 2 nights of just so-so sleep. The swelling in his foot/ankle isn't going down despite his best effort to keep it elevated and off of it. The pain is about the same as well...however at night he does seem to be able to go longer stretches while he sleeps without a re-dose of meds! His blood sugar is still out of whack and low most of the times.....He looks tired and worn out.....so during the day for the most part he naps...which is good for him....(thanks to all those who text first to see if its ok to call so you don't wake him up!) we just wish his body clock was 12 hours different and he slept during the night and not day....but since we have really no schedule of sorts....sleep is sleep right???

On a side note our water heater is leaking so it needs to be replaced :o( When it rains it pours!!!

Love to you all! We are blessed to have you all in our lives!

A better day...

So after yesterdays emotional ride....we had a much nicer one today! Ray (with the help of Ambien) was able to get a GREAT nights rest last night.....he went to bed about 9:30p...then I checked his blood sugar at 11:30p (low so it was a drink of juice) then he slept till 5am (potty break) then back again till 8:30am! He hasn't slept that good in YEARS! He didn't even remember the two times he was up! Then today was low key and resting....we did spend about 2 1/2 hours outside...the girls got to play with friends...and I got to talk to one of my besties...and Ray soaked up some vitamin D! We had a good dinner of shells (Thanks Tory!) and that always helps when I don't have to cook. And he is in bed already....so hopefully he will get just as good a rest as last night! I am off to bed shortly too! Thanks again for all the prayers and support and kindness! We love you!

Pictures from today's Dr.'s visit....

His swollen foot....it is HUGE!

The knee incision is where they inserted the rod.....and the shin is where the tumor and bone was removed and then replaced with the cadaver bone

getting ready to reapply half cast

Dr. visit....and a few blows to the gut.....

So today was our 2nd post op visit for the 2nd operation......we were hoping for a boot and not a cast.....well the result!?!??! Neither!! After they removed it....they discovered it is far to swollen for either.....Ray did like the fact that the half cast was off...He got about 1/2 hour without anything.....they took some X-rays....and removed the staples from the knee....the ones on the shin will have to stay in place at least for another week. The wound in comparison from the first surgery is horrible! The first one really looked good...not much discoloration (just the little red spot of the minor infection) but his the whole leg was VERY discolored and swollen and the cut now has sutures with the staples. His poor foot was the most swollen.....it LOOKED painful! So that was our first blow.....back into the half cast for at least another week. 2nd blow was from the X-rays.....it was weird seeing all the hardware and I was under the impression that this was a pretty solid fix......the upper part (near the knee) looks great it only has one pin through the rod....but near the ankle/metatarsals it is FULL of hardware....plates, pins and the rod. And we knew from the surgery that they had to go WAY close to the ankle/foot-leg connection but until we saw the X-rays we had no idea how TRULY close it was! So this is our most vital part.......its the thing we must pray heals and fuses together. If it doesn't (and would be called a non-union) that would be trouble!!! No use of the foot and in extreme case amputation ::shudder:: So this area is the top priority right now. He compared it to a paper clip and if you keep bending it back and forth it eventually breaks....that's what we want to avoid and pray it heals! 3rd blow came in the topic of margins....this we were familiar with due to Ray's two abdominal surgeries...in a nut shell when they remove something they hope to remove it far enough to have CLEAN margins....the top looks great....CLEAN margins....but at that darn ankle/foot area there was cancer cells present.....Not the best news....this means on top of the radiation we already planned on chemo will be most likely (so hard on his weak body) but all this will be a mute point if we can't get it to heal....so either chemo/radiation is out for probably another month or so....4th blow.......healing time could be in excess of 3-6 MONTHS! ARGH! We were still in our frame of mind of 6-8 weeks!!! It was a horrible afternoon for me.....and a surreal one for Ray (thanks in part to heavy pain meds) So we left with some wind knocked out of our sail.....and some new prescriptions.....more pain pills for Ray and some Ambien....to help Ray sleep...his sleep is getting less and less despite the pain meds.....We follow up in a week to see how things have progressed. Well there you have it.....And I don't want to sound demanding or anything but we could sure use and extra prayer or two to build up our faith to endure to the end! Oh also.....as we were waiting for Dr. Scott (a long time too which is unusual) and then when he finally came in he apologized and then went on to explain he was with a family and a patient FOURTEEN years old is all that has the same thing as Ray.....a tumor in her bone but this one is in the femur. Ray and I shared some tears for this girl......I don't know her name or anything but please pray for her as well!! We love you all!

Two steps forward....one step back...

Ok...I apologize for not blogging sooner....I can't believe the weekend came and went so fast. Saturday was another decent day.....we went to my Mom's house to visit her, visit some out of town dear friends, and bottom line it was nice to be out of the house for us and the kids! Ray was animated and full of chat (which is so nice to see!) He had his humor and loved chatting with everyone! Thanks Janet & Chuckie! Before we knew it we spent almost 6 hours there!! What an outing for Ray! But then that night it hit....Things were normal as we went to bed and Ray got a decent sleep from about 8:30p till about 11p....then it was pain, chills, slight fever, he was up every hour...and from 2:00a-4:30a he was up constant....it was bad in many ways...but it was also good for Ray and I...we were able to talk about of sensitive things and we were both emotionally stable so it was a GREAT talk! I just wish it wasn't because he was up with pain!
The next day we were both exhausted!!! We did go back to my Mom's for some breakfast and to say good bye to our friends. A much shorter visit on Sunday....then we got back home and got Ray settled...he slept off and on through the afternoon and eve and then we were all in bed by 9pm ish. It was a better night then Saturday's night only up a couple times but he is still tired. We still haven't figured out exactly whats causing his lows on the blood sugar...I went online and found that the pain pills can indeed cause it....so we are just monitoring closely. Today is a rest day for us. My sister is gonna reprieve the girls from boredom today (Thanks Manda!) and I hope Ray and I get a nap OR two!!! One more day till Dr. Scott's appointment....Ray is so anxious and wants it here!

It's Friday.....right?

So Thursday was an O.K. day! Ray had some pain but it was tolerable with the pills....we even hung in the rectangle for a couple hours and it felt semi normal! The kids played with friends and Ray soaked up sunshine! Ray is still having rough nights (seems like days are ok) he has pain, uncomfortable with cast, sweats, and lower blood sugar to worry about. But he is going longer stretches without pain pills so less loopy but then when the pain hits ...it hits hard. Another good sign is that he WANTS to go back to work! (can you imagine saying that??) He is also anxious to have his cast off!!! Even though Tuesday it will come off (another will be put right back on) but he says he is looking forward to wiggling his ankle and toes even if its just for a few minutes!!! We continue to be blessed tremendously!! This morning we went to breakfast with Ray's parents...it was nice to get out of the house for a bit and we had some good conversation along with some excellent food! Thanks Mom & Dad for treating us! Thanks to all who have brought dinners, soups, etc...they are all greatly appreciated! I really thought I could do it all...but really we are all so exhausted all the time! Also we enjoy the calls of people chatting for a few and checking up on us. Without you all we wouldn't be strong enough to endure!!

Love to you all!

HUMP day....

Last night was a little more restless for Ray then usual. He had two drops in his blood sugar. A 33 and a 53....dangerously low...for some reason his pain pills drop it lower then normal...so I watched him closely and checked the blood sugar frequently. The best news was that Ray went a longer stretch without pain meds today!!! He had his last one at 5:00am and didn't have one until 2:30pm!!! Now he is loopy again! :o) I worked on bills today...and it got me to reflecting again on how blessed we are! I thought about how little blessings come and serve in big ways! I haven't gone into details on some of the things that happened at the fund raiser but one comes to mind I wanted to share.....The Reudter's girls worked the lemon water stand.....and sweet Gabby served up a cup to a gentleman (no one that we knew) that paid for that $0.15 glass with a HUNDRED DOLLAR BILL!! And he didn't want change!....I also so kids that brought their own allowance to donate and buy things! Some other kids...did face painting and leg, arms whatever...and earned some great donations! Its all these sweet people....kids and adults.....that reinforce there is a LOT of good in this world! I love you all!

Till next time....

JP's GONE!

So today was our 1st follow up for the 2nd surgery :o) I think my brain is mush!!! Last night went ok....except for we had some kids crawling into our bed during a tremendous thunder/lightening/wind/rain storm! I love those! I think it is so funny, Ray gets so out of it...it doesn't realize he is sleeping so much!!! We did ok last night...Ray only needed to get re-dosed once during the night. Today for the Dr. visit Courtney was able to go to her school friends house "M" thanks April for letting her come!!! Cami went along with us to the appointment. I think she may be my "doctor in the family" either that or she is so much like me and likes all the blood and guts of surgeries and such! (Bring on Trauma Life in the E.R.!!!) She has helped me when I do the striping and draining of the JP drains (Ray had two) She would help me look to measure it then flush it! It never grossed her out...although there were several gooey clots (ok I know TMI!!) She also liked the fact that we have a wheel chair for Daddy now (Thanks Papa and Great Grandma!!!) She pushed him around and we even took Daddy down to the hospital cafeteria for lunch! (A hint here....IMC has the best food and its CHEAP!) Ray and I sometimes have a lunch date there! :o) There wasn't much of an evaluation today just the removal of the LONG JP tubes! Ray's blood pressure hit the roof I think! Cami and I just looked on with enthusiasm!! We follow up again in a week for xrays, labs, and possibly a hard FULL cast. Cami was a little disappointed...she wanted to see ALL of Daddy's "bolts" aka staples!!! She will have to wait till next week! We came home to pick up Courtney but they still wanted her to stay and this time Cami wanted to stay (Thanks again April!!) so we had a quiet (and I really mean quiet...no a/c, no TV, no computer....the power was out for about 45 mins) not that it bothered Ray he slept for 2 1/2 hours! He asked me why I didn't wake him up?!??! Silly boy doesn't he know that is why we are home to heal....NO INTERRUPTIONS!!! I can entertain myself....I had a while to read and just de-stress! Well again thanks for all everyone has done! Both in prayers and thoughts and actions! We are truly grateful!

Sabbath....A day of rest....for Ray

Ok I think Saturday night went ok...we combated pain intermixed with sleep but he did sleep in about 3 hour stretches!!! Sunday was a nice and relaxing day.....Courtney slept in till 11:00am!!! She has NEVER done that!!! And that was on top of that we all were sleeping by 10:00pm Saturday night! I think Saturday wore us all out!! So Ray did a lot of sleeping Sunday day.....we had the Sacrament brought to us so we could partake. The girls played with all their toys they have missed over the last 3 weeks. We had a delicious dinner of pot roast, potatoes, and carrots a side salad and the kids favorite chocolate ice-cream for dessert! Thanks Doane's!!! It was so appreciated! Last night we had a movie night with all of us and Ray was awake enough to enjoy the screening of Toy Story 2....then off to bed....now last night wasn't as good as before....Ray was more restless....and only slept in little pieces.....we tried a Valium (first time he has had it this time around at home) but it did little.....I hope today he can catch up a bit. My dad is taking the girls a bit to play with their cousins (Thanks Papa!!) and that gives Ray and I a great opportunity to nap!! Today we call the Dr's office to set up our appointment for tomorrow. We have another movie night in the works...its so nice to all snuggle together and enjoy! Thanks again for all the prayers, help and phone calls they are all felt and appreciated!

A great July 31st!

Ok so I left off last time with me heading back to the hospital and awaiting the girls to visit Ray....He had asked about them continually and was ready for some loving! They did come (Thanks Papa and Great Grandma for bringing them!) and they were full of chit chat!!! And yes we did do our usually ice-cream run...but the surprise this time....Ray loaded into a wheel chair for his second adventure to the cafeteria in one day!!! WTG honey!!! We had a lot of fun! And we ate backwards...had ice-cream then the girls said they were hungry...so THEN we had dinner...Ray was alert and chatting and we had the great company of his nephew Dustin (Thanks Dustin it was a fun eve!) The girls had what they call the yummiest bacon, scrambled eggs and toast! They ate about half of the huge order then Ray finished off every bite!!! After that we headed back upstairs....met his family in the hall and said our good nights and settled in for the night....it was about the same as the night before but with a little more up and down because he could now go INTO the bathroom!!! The next morning we had a quite a surprise....Dr. Scott came bright and early and gave us the run down that things looked good......He was going to give Ray one last transfusion to "fill him to the gills" and also called it "added insurance" just to give him a head start for home....yep that is right....HOME!! A day or two earlier then we expected!!! Ray was anxious over this but after talking a while with Dr. Scott then we got a visit from Dr. Ott and he concurred Ray was at peace with it an happy! So since we had seen both Dr's and had to wait for the transfusion I headed home to check out the fund raising yard sale. I came home the back way then walked through the side yard....(now remember I had seen pictures and they kept telling me they didn't do the sale just BOY WERE THEY RIGHT!!) I was overwhelmed with emotion as I opened my gate to see the great expanse of things too sell!!! It stretched the length of the common area and those of you who know our rectangle now that is a HUGE space!!!! I was in tears as I moved from one person to another....all those who had worked all week and then the night before till midnight pricing and setting up....THEN getting up at 430 am to meet eager crowds that arrived at 630am!!! There was so much going on!!! Booth of goodies! Booth of snow-cones! Booth of face painting! Booth of yummy lemon water!!! Booth of crafts! You name we had it.....it was like a rectangle department store! I am so glad I took the time leave the hospital to come and feel the love and strength of this event!!!!! I saw people I haven't seen in years/decades supporting me. People I had no idea who they were....my dear family that worked hard right along with all those (my chosen family members) who coordinating this event.....it was amazing!!! Two people that I know of (don't know who either of them are) bought a 15 cent lemon water with a $100 bill and didn't want change.....to another who bought about $6 dollars worth of baked goods with $100 bill and didn't want change...and everyone seemed to do that.....buy something worth 6 or 7 dollars pay for it with a $20 and donated the change! It was so amazing!!! I stayed for a couple of hours then headed back to the hospital. Ray was just barely getting the transfusion underway....and it takes about 3 hours...also that day Ray had a really solid 2 1/2 hours of DEEP sleep.....when he woke up he asked why he wasn't home and I told him that he had to show he was able to remain somewhat alert.....after hearing that he worked hard on doing just that and soon we were out the door about 6:00pm ish....As we headed home he mentioned he wanted to stop out front and chat with a few of the neighbors to thank them for all they did at the yard sale. As we got there I did think it weird that everyone was wanting to know an approximate time! (so unlike them!) but as we arrived we had the Wood's, Doane's, Noice's, Reudeter's, Preston's and my Sister and kids (a handful of those who worked hard to pull this off) they were there to get their hugs from us...then in the sweetest/funniest way they wanted us to guess how much the day earned.....Ray and I gave our guesses....after that all the ladies held up their hands in order with a number each to indicate the total!! They were worried about Ray falling over but it turned out it was me! In our wildest dreams we never could have imagined the total!!!!! Tears flowed freely!!! (I want you all to know it was tears of joy this time!!) :o) This was a HUGE success. It would not have been possible without the hard work and pre-planning of The Wood's and Doane's the eagerness of the Reudter's, Noice's, and Preston's to help.....Deb, Latisha, Kristy, My Sister Amanda, Heather, Loren, Nathan, Mark, Mike, Jamy, My Dad, My Mom,KM, Ronnie.......well you get the picture! ALL of you who helped!!! Also the community and friends (some who came from miles away) to buy, donate and support us! You all made this a huge success! It truly was an event blessed on by Heavenly Father and truly showed Christ like love!!! We are always going to have you in our hearts and prayers! Thank you! Thank You! Thank you!! We got our girls home and we were all under the same roof and loving just sitting with each other! We all ended up in bed early....all of us asleep before 10pm!! It was an ok night....pain and sleep repeated throughout the night but we made it! On to recovery!! Thanks again all for those who helped, silently in prayer, phone calls, letters, cards, you name it we have had it! We are glad to be home but want to stress that we are not having visitors. Ray needs to be able to sleep on demand and not feel like he has to entertain or try and stay awake for the sake of visiting. It is draining on both of us! Love to you all!!!

You could cut it with a knife.....

::SIGH:: Yesterday was so tension filled you could really...(well check the title) Ray was relatively quiet....I think he was really pulling the reserves from deep within...as all of this has drained what little he had to grasp too! All the rest of us...were in that wait mode...would the surgery be a go....would we have another let down....well turns out bright and early we got our visit from Dr. Scott. He said the labs looked great! His INR which was WAY too high the day before at 4.1 was at 1.8!!! It was on.....surgery was tentatively scheduled to begin 2p-3p. Since they had him NPO since midnight and his blood sugar as a tad low Dr. Scott allowed a juice and a little water...the cut off time of a few sips was 8am. The rest of the morning was spent preparing....greeting arriving family....and of course the inevitable hospital wait! Near noon I head down to eat....as I come back up...I was informed they ran some labs and he was going to get yet another transfusion....his platelets were 1250!!!! Ok this is where I did a "Whoah beep beep back up the train" How can we go from over 1 million to 1250 in less then 24 hours???!?!?!? I asked the nurse if this would put off surgery and she said possibly...I was so distraught.....I just didn't understand how this could be...after all...weren't we checking with the medical oncologist about the HIGH platelets??? And now this??? So we prepared for the transfusion even asked again to have the platelets explained by the nurse but 2 just wasn't equaling 2. Finally about 1:30p ish we did get the transfusion started and the yep...surgery is on....but instead of 2 or 3....he was taken about 4:15pm. Tick Tock Tock...we passed the 30 minute mark so we all safely assumed that he was out for the count....then Tick Tock...Tick Tock...we played Farkle!, Rummy, 31, BlackJack and laughed....to pass those darn hospital minutes! FINALLY about 7pm ish Dr. Scott emerged said things went well. There was a HUGE hematoma in the calf....he irrigated it out...and found and repaired the bleeder. The Dr. also solved the mystery of the HIGH/LOW platelets....it was just a miss reading by the nurse...apparently the nurses don't read the zero's....so his count was 1,250,000.....That made a lot more sense!!! He was in recovery and Dr. said go grab a bite to eat...relax and he would be up in the room before we knew it. While I was digesting all the info hugging all those around and decided what to do....the phone in the waiting room rang....it was our family and two others...and since no volunteer that late I answered the phone they wanted the wife of Raymond W....luckily I hadn't left....Teesa the recovery nurse explained that Ray was totally confused and agitated because he couldn't remember so they came and got me to go back to the recovery room. I got spend the 30 or so minutes with him. He was "stuck" in a work haze. That's so Ray though! He is such a hard worker even in the depths of anesthesia he works :o) He had the nurse Teesa on edge just because he was so defiant that he needed to unload his truck and park it. He even tried to escape the bed a time or two after I was there. Each and every time he closed his eyes for a few seconds then wake back up we had to start all over again. He was even confused throughout the whole night!!! After we got back up to the room everyone gave there hugs and departed. We settled in for what I thought was going to be a very rough night! Now don't get me wrong it was LONG, HARD, and EXHAUSTING but not what I feared. We dealt with pain and confusion the whole night...but we did get sleep in about hour and half increments. His biggest complaint beyond those two was that he WANTED to get out of bed...but he was on complete bed rest....he couldn't put that leg on the floor at all! That was a fight! He did have a sense of humor though and the nurse and aide were giggling most of the night! This morning we had an early morning visit from Dr. Scott...he gave a run down of today's plan of action...UP and walking with PT....weaning from PDA (pain pump) and healing! While he was there guess who came....Dr. Ott!!!! Ray was ecstatic!!!! He literally beamed and even asked Dr. Ott if Ott could see his countenance change! Doc Ott was so soothing as always and always joking with Ray...Ott did tell Ray he looked pretty bad though...."You need a shave" :o) After that...we did exactly that...pain pump...GONE! walk with PT DONE!...a chair/sponge bath...DONE!....linens and gowns changed DONE...we even snuck off to the cafeteria via wheelchair where Ray could PICK his own food! He loved it....he had sweet and sour pork, rice, corn, and a choc chip cookie!!! We did promptly report that he would need some extra insulin upon our return LOL! Ray's parents showed up shortly there after I was off to home to shower, laundry and change myself. So here we are....I am doing a quick jaunt here at home then back off to the hospital...Courtney & Cami are coming for a visit and I am certain an ice cream stop in the cafeteria!

On a side note....I am brought to tears to see all the work done on our behalf.....I have decided that those who have arranged and are setting up the Yard Sale should run the country! They can accomplish anything!!! Its amazing to see all the donations, hear the good word and progress, people who don't even know us donating cash. ALL of it is truly a blessing!!! I have to share a cute thing Cami said....The article in the Davis County Clipper about us was great and my Dad and Sister had showed the girls and article. They were excited!!! So when Cami shared the news with Great Grandma she said..."Guess what Great Grandma....we are in the newspaper! Maybe tonight we will be on the news!!!" That made my heart melt!!!

Thanks to all!

Love,
Sheri

Its was the worst yet!!

So.....thanks to Brek again for giving you all a few updates I was unable to get to home and give my daily updates....Thanks to my Bro-in-law Rob for bringing his laptop in to my so I can give a recount of the last day and a half! Ok....so its starts yesterday morning....we had our Hyperbaric meds appointment (for intake and set up a plan) and then our 1st post-op with Dr. Scott that same day later in the afternoon. Well Ray had had a decent night sleep....we didn't have the girls because they wanted to stay at AnaMana's and we were taking our morning nice and slow. About 8am Ray starting getting some more intense pains....so he took a Valium and rested until almost 9am. So then we headed out to our first appointment (a little late) with the increasing pain it was harder to get him ready and dressed. Well miracle of all miracles we were only 10 minutes late.....we checked in and started the usual paperwork....but Ray was now almost doubled over in pain.....we went to the nurse practitioner to have his vitals done...they were concerned with how much it was in pain so the other nurse called Dr. Scott's office.....they were going to try and work him in sooner.....so Ray wanted to go wait elsewhere so Hyperbaric was going to call our cell phone when they heard something.....so for now they discontinued the Hyperbaric eval because this took precedence. As we were headed up to the main level Ray decided he just As were approaching the right floor we got a call that said they were ready for us.....we arrived about a minute later check in then waited......we waited for about 20 mins...(which felt like 2 hours) each minute getting worse and worse.....finally they took us back. Dr. Scott said "Wow Ray! What happened...you look a complete 180 from discharge on Saturday" so they took off the half cast and took a look....Ray did have some minor cellulitis.....and extreme tenderness....It was decided that he was going to be admitted for pain control and to start the IV antibiotics. It took about 30 minutes for them the get the room available so Ray laid on the exam table in Dr. Scott's office until we could get check in. This was our worst of the worst.....Ray was really ready to go.....and I don't mean home.....we shared some private moments and lots of tears.......Well we finally got over to our room...but it was another 55 mins until the pain meds were administered.....He was at a TEN on the pain scale....we finally got some relief.....and within the hour he was resting more comfortable....so then started coming the labs....His hematocrit was down to 19...needs to be over 35.....they ordered 2 transfusions (this brings his total to 6 for the last week) also his platelet count was over a million should be around 300,000 so they are looking into lab work for that.....so that brings us to last night...it was an ok night...patches of sleep with periods of restlessness....3 bathroom trips that resulted into falls (he now has the bedside approach for nature calls) Oh he also had a CT earlier in that eve...so we are to this morning.....Dr. Scott came in.....CT did show that there is a collection of blood...due to possible ruptured blood vessel....shoot for surgery about 3pm.....had a decent day.....he slept off and on...3:10 came and he was off to surgery...another emotional private moment or two....and I go to the cafeteria with my Dad and Mom....grab a quick drink and snack and head up to the waiting room....get set up to play some Farkle! to speed the time by....10 minutes later I see what I thought was Dr. Scott walk by us (we were in the back area near the elevators) I said to Mom and Dad "I think that was Dr. Scott" My Mom "No, it couldn't be this early" so I walk around the corner where he is asking for "Sheri" I call out and he turns....by the look of surprise on my face he quickly reassures me that Ray is ok....then he says "Oh they must not have told you that he didn't go in for the surgery" WHAT?!?!??! Turns out his INR was high (this tells how thin/thick the blood is for clotting) normal is about 1.8 to 2.0 his was 4.1! Dr. Scott and the anesthesiologist decides its not worth the risk. They give him a Vitamin K shot (to reverse the effects of the Coumadin) and we are going to have to wait for surgery till tomorrow afternoon. Tonight has been up and down....he ate a great dinner (thanks Mom & Dad Wojtasek for staying with him while I ran home to freshen up!) Mom W says he ate it all! Which is great! But now that night is full on Rob and I are here and Ray's pain has been almost unbearable again. We are ticking away the minutes till 10:15pm when he can get his next Valium...

Oh and also a disclaimer....I am so tired....I hope this post makes sense!

Thanks to all those who continue all your support!

Until the next post....

Loves....

Surgery Tomorrow

Its Brek again. Sheri asked me to post an update since she is unable to from the hospital. Ray will go back into surgery tomorrow. They are going to open up his leg again and look for blood vessel issues. He has been low on blood and in extreme pain so they think there might be a blood vessel that might be leaking from the surgery. Also his platelets are high. Normal people have about 300,000, and Ray's has been climbing. Today he was over a million. So they are doing a screen for blood cancer.

Here's to hoping that the surgery will get him out of the pain that he's been in.

I'll post tomorrow if an update is needed before Sheri can get home to do it.

And back to the hospital they go.....

Hey everyone. Brek here (I'm Ray & Sheri's next door neighbor). Sheri asked me to give a quick update. They went in for a doctor's appointment this morning and Ray was in EXTREME pain. They unwrapped the leg and found that he had cellulitis (not sure on the spelling) of the skin down by his incision. This is an infection. The doc admitted him to the hospital and got him on a couple of different antibiotics and also some morphine. They are running some tests to see just how infected it is - whether it is just the skin or if it has gone further, like into the tissue, muscle, or bone. Again, it looks like right now it is cellulitis of the skin. I'm sure Sheri will keep us updated if things change. Please just keep on praying for this special little family! We sure do love them!

The Good....The Bad....and the Dunk Tank...

I am so sorry I didn't do an update yesterday...it was a horrible night two nights ago...it all started about 5 p.m. Ray was in the kitchen when he had a muscle spasm hit......Ray was in excruciating pain!!! It would take his breath away!! For about 2 hours we kinda battled...I was frustrated he wouldn't do anything about it...he was in pain and hated me asking things...so it was NOT a good combo....plus the girls were here and watching Ray in so much pain and me finally just saying "Fine, I'm done...you do it" kinda scared them. So after about those 2 hours we made a phone call to the doctor. He ordered Valium to relax the muscles....the funny thing is that Ray had this exact same scenario the night of his surgery it was another intense night but I guess due to the surgery that morning and all the drugs he didn't remember. But after my Dad picked up the Valium (Thanks Dad!!!) it was still a LONG night....we were both up till way past 3:30am! He was very loopy and was talking weird things...but still having a lot of pain! I felt so bad for him! I wanted to take even a fraction of pain away! There was a few funny parts (well they were not funny then but they are now!) Ray says "Honey where is my suit?" I am thinking his church clothes..... Me: "What do you mean?" Ray: "My suit....I gotta go get into the dunk tank....they are ready for me" :o) He also started a fever again low grade.....so per doctor's instruction we are doing a Tylenol regimen and closely monitoring it. So yesterday morning Ray was exhausted and thankfully had enough meds in him the pain was tolerable. He slept.....for a bit....my girls nerves were on edge and with the offer of going with Manda for the day they jumped at it! (Thanks Manda!) The sad point for me and it made me cry is when the girls didn't want to come back home. Cami had told my sister all day long....."I am going to have a sleepover AnaMana....my Mom says she gives up" I need to be extremely cautious of my feelings and words around the girls....I forget they are just as sensitive to our situation as Ray and I. I am sorry girls....Mommy will try harder! So yesterday we headed off to the IHC in Btfl...had some labs drawn.....came home and with the girls gone...we both caught up on some much needed rest....well Ray rested all day....I decided to clean the toy room and "sort out" a few things with the girls gone....but after that we both napped well. It went through the night too Ray only woke up a couple of times for meds and slept till about 6am. So here we are Tuesday....we have two appointments today....Hyperbaric Medicine then follow-up with Dr. Scott. I will give an update hopefully this evening.

I wanted to say thanks (sorry I sound like a broken record) but there has been so many helping us in many forms.....My prayers include ALL of you who are helping, praying and well wishing!! We love you all!

Until the next time...

Loves....

Sporadic funnies....

Ok I have posted already some of the funnies Ray did or said while on his drugs....but I thought I'd include a few more.....It is nice that in a time of stress and the unknown we could laugh now and then to release a little tension!



1: The second volunteer we had in the surgery waiting room was an odd duck...but she did provide entertainment.....She was OLD I would guess close to 90. Hard of hearing and spoke with a heavy accent. As people would walk up to address a question she would ask "What do YOU want" as if she wasn't supposed to be our middle person to what was going on with our love ones in back. Then she would say something to the effect..."Well you will know more then I, When the doctor comes out he will talk to you" That day it was full in the O.R. and apparently pretty darn full in the rooms of the in patient tower because we heard many a times....ok your patient is ready and done with recovery we are just trying to find a room. So there was a lot of anxious people in the waiting room. This one gentleman stood out in our minds as the whole scene unfolded.....He approached her wanting info on his wife....she gave her usual spill...but then reluctantly called back to the O.R. desk....She spoke with them...then said they wanted to talk to the hubby....she then stated very rudely, VERY loud..."After you get done talking to the nurse you come right back here and tell me exactly what she said!!! That way I will know what to tell you next time!!" The whole waiting room was snickering at this point...I mean isn't the point of re-asking how things are is to get an UPDATED update? Not the same thing you heard 2 hours prior? So she send him to the hallway phone....and this poor gentleman is so confused he goes out and picks up the phone.....well the volunteer lady had not transferred it to the phone yet and now with him on it she could not....so she starts banging on the glass walls and yelling at him to hang up the phone! Finally Ray's dad did say something to the fact...of "Give the guy a break will ya!"

2: Ray was in bed...I think it was our second evening post surgery and he is loopy on morphine and he is acting out driving his truck and just like he does in real life he was yelling that the "idiots on the road!"

3: Ray kept asking the nurses when he was going to hydrotherapy.....One nurse after probably hearing at least 5 times in a minute asked him what he meant...and basically he described something like a hot tub....When the nurse said he couldn't get his leg wet he said he'd just hold it up!!

4: This one happened when he was a little more lucid....he was still on pain meds but it wasn't the morphine....this sweet little gal came in....I am guessing she was of Hispanic decent so she didn't speak much English...but she knocked on the door and asked if she could clean our room....we said sure. Then about 15 or 20 seconds later Ray said "then I will give you my home address" You know Ray and his humor......he meant that she could clean our house next....but this poor gal had the deer in the headlights syndrome and stuttered a second or two before she said "Oh I am married" LOL it was so funny! She was so uncomfortable the rest of the time she spent in the room!

5; As the girls were leaving one night pretty late....He was still on morphine and still way wacky...he told the girls to "Call me tomorrow when you are home from school" Both girls looked at me half frightened half thinking Daddy has really lost it...I reminded them that Daddy says funny things sometimes....then I can't remember if it was Cami or Courtney that said "Daddy needs a calendar to remind him we are out of school!"

Well those are just a few I remember I KNOW there is several others....if there is one you remember let me know I'll add them.....just so we have some blackmail material later on :o)

Our First Day/Night at home...

So yesterday was so grand....we were home....girls under our roof....Ray's fav chair, his woobie (heating pad) and our bed!! It was so nice to not have any interruptions....no nurses, no "needle girl" , no announcements at 2 am, 3 am, 4 am (you get the picture) "Code Trauma Alert 2" repeated 3 times! The downside.....I was out of practice for multi tasking in "Mommy mode" There was no cafeteria in which cooked me delicious meals...no one brought Ray meals right to his bedside/chair....the girls needed to eat too! I was exhausted....but all in one breath I was glad that I was HOME and able to do all this!! Ray slept 90% of the day yesterday....I think he was in catch up mode.....he didn't have much of an appetite so finally "mean nurse Sheri" had to kick his butt and make him eat at least ONE decent meal. This morning his appetite is back! Last night I am happy to report....BOTH girls slept through the whole night in their own beds...a rare occurrence in this household....and Ray had decent night sleep, slept in bed till almost 3 am (3 weeks ago he was lucky if he got 2 or 3 hours total in a night!) then got situated downstairs for a change of pace and slept until about 6am!!! We are hoping for the same today....QUIET times...enjoying the peace...and letting us all re-coop!!! Thanks again to all who have expressed love, prayers and actions on our behalf!

Until next time....

Loves....

BLESSED!!

I have so many things to be grateful for! I have some incredible friends and family who got me through yesterday...it was an emotional one. I didn't dare cry with/in front of Ray he was overloaded. I missed my girls so much it physically caused me pain....We were stressed over the MRI findings in the pelvis.....we were stressing over another weekend in the hospital....well you get the picture. I had a tearful and so helpful phone call with "B" and several great texts and a wonderfully uplifted message via google talk thanks "J"!!! Ray's evening last night was full of anxiety, it was clear by about 6pm that we weren't getting any MRI news....Rays leg was looking a teensy bit less swollen (at this point we take pride in BABY steps!) After about 10pm his 4th transfusion was complete and he didn't get hooked up to another IV bag so he had some more freedom of movement (if you can hobbling at a snails pace movement!) So we had a decent night.....and come morning....he was perkier and feisty!!! (always a good sign!) Ray's parents showed up about 10 minutes before Dr. Scott....The docs first words were...."Wow, your looking so much better this morning" (not one person could disagree!! He was a totally different man from the night before!) Then Dr. Scott asked if they would excuse us for a few minutes....(both Ray and I silently figured it was bad news about the MRI) so his parents stepped out and he proceeded to take out both his drain bulbs...it was funny Dr. Scott explained it would be like pulling out two very long worms...He said some of the "worms" have teeth some do not. You shoulda seen Ray's eyes!! As Ray grimaced and moaned...Dr. Scott announced "Oh these ones musta had teeth!" It was so funny! Well then he goes and gets Ray's parents...as it turns out the MRI was negative!!!! What a relief....Ray's other labs looked great! There was only one in question......and that is his platelet count the average person has about 300,000 Ray's is about double that a little over 600,000. So Dr. Scott also wants us to follow up with a Medical Oncologist not to be confused with Dr. Scott and Ott who are our SURGICAL Oncologist....and its also different from Dr. Thomason who is our RADIATION oncologist! JEEZ add onto that our PCP....and our Endocrinologist....we are "ist'ed" prettily heavily!! :o) So guess what....WE ARE HOME! After all that was said he told Ray....How about we get you home! It was a surprise (albeit a happy one) to us! We figured it would at least be another day or two!!! And surprisingly after that was announced we were out of the hospital within a couple hours! And if Ray had not misunderstood the nurse we could have left sooner....but we were having such a pleasant time talking with Ray's parents and his sister Carrie....now instead of the room feeling like a prison....we were all calm enough to just be pleasantly chatting!! So we are home....the girls are home!!! (Ray even said....."Oh it will be so good to have the girls here and home and fighter" LOL) So here is our plan....we have a very low key weekend. We are not going anywhere.....we are actually being very reclusive! Sorry but we just aren't up to entertaining visitors! Its so nice to not have to put on a face...we are lounging and loving it! Monday we make contact with Dr. Scotts office to arrange our first post-op check either Tuesday or Thursday. We make contact with the Hyper baric Chamber doctor. Ray will do the Hyper baric therapy to aide in the healing of his leg since he is diabetic. Home health care will visit us about 3 times a week....Ray will be closely monitored through lab work while he is on Coumadin. We want to prevent a stroke!!! I also wanted to say that I am brought to tears of true humility in regards to all those who are helping my family! To "M" & "T" and all those who are helping them with the fund raiser...you are amazing!!!! I cannot believe the hard work you are doing and this is in addition to the busy family lives you already have! You are truly are daughters of God and radiate the Light of Christ! Thank you Thank you!!

Well I will update daily about our ups and downs....and look out soon for a post with some of the funnier moments!

Until the next post....

Loves....

I hit MY wall....

So after yesterdays update and I went back to the hospital we had a fairly good day....Ray's parents reported that he was able to "go" multiple times during the day had gone a good distance in his hall had a decent meal and had been a good boy with his breathing exercises! (This morning no crackling sounds!! We are too keep up the good work!) He also had some great visitors....Mike N came and he said it was good to have him there and feel his peace. He had 3 HS friends come and that was another boost to hear them reminisce of days gone by. We went for a walk and he lapped the hall to the half way part!! Amazing! All was looking good and the pain meds made him more lucid!!! We did have a downer part his surgical leg started to swell. We noticed it and Ray really felt it...most of the swelling was knee up to pelvis. They called Dr. Scott and he didn't seem too concerned since there was no fever present, no redness...so he told them he would check it at rounds in the morning and let him know if it changed. My tears resurfaced yesterday....I hadn't really had much tears since the night this all started on the 10th.....I had cried them out and was the strong one again.....but BAM! I had them yesterday....it was one of those days that even a stinking diaper commercial could bring them on. I know I am sleep deprived, stressed over medical bills, stressed over living expenses, and worried over Ray's long term prognosis.....so I guess I am allowed a little eye leakage now and then right??? Last night was better then any of them yet. Although little sleep on either part (not good on the leaky eye syndrome I have acquired again!) due to he went to the bathroom every hour and the leg throbbed a little more.....but I tried my best to help Ray and his apology to me in the middle of the night that I had to go through all this brought silent tears again (good thing it was dark) He doesn't like it when his words cause tears. So it was emotional and draining....fast forward to rounds this morning. Dr. Scott was a little more worried of the leg it is really puffy...he could push his fingers in the skin deep and the depressions would stay a long time! Ray's labs did show he is low on blood again.....Dr. was kinda at a loss as to where its going.....no obvious oozing from the leg and the drain tubes haven't needed to be emptied in over 24 hours. So, next plan for today obviously not coming home :o( He will be having another transfusion....He will be scheduled for an ultrasound to look for blood clots in the leg...and an MRI on the pelvis to check for a possible tumor. Before I came home they did get the ultrasound done and the tech said it looked good. No blood clot....no time was set yet for the MRI.....so tick tock tick tock waiting again.....I have a few funny moments but right now I don't feel like doing the funny stuff....I'll post again with them....I don't want to sound selfish...but today I could use and extra prayer or two :o)

Until the next post......

Loves.....

Midnight......that's why I am usually in bed!

Ok....last night can only be labeled WEIRD! And like clock work from the night before....Midnight strikes and Ray (instead of turning into a pumpkin) turned into an attempted escape artist, Houdini, stunt man, and a person who is able to speak in a foreign language (although I'm not sure from where) :o).....want a translation?? Ok here it is....I'm woke up about 12:01am by the alarm sounding on Ray's pulse ox.....I try to get his attention like I usually do "Ray, breath in through the nose out through the mouth" he mumbles here and there so I know he is pretty out of it from the drugs....by the time I get up and over to the bed the nurse is there...I guess he had pushed the button to call the nurse but never really said much. Come to find out that turkey was trying to get out of bed on his own to go "somewhere" he wasn't sure where he wanted to go! He had taken off his oxygen, pulse ox monitor not only from the cord but also he took the taped one on his finger off, he had his leg compression cuffs off, his BP cuff off, and was attempting to take one of his two IV's off/out! So after being chastised by the nurse and me we get him all hooked up back in bed. He is in bed for about 10 mins when he tells me he needs to go to the bathroom! (We still haven't been successful in this area yet since cath removal) I want to call the aide but he veto's that....so I get him all unhooked (legally this time!) and head to the bathroom. I get him situated and give him his privacy. Next thing I know he has fallen! Soaking wet....we had a basin of warm water near him. Our stubborn patient of the evening decided to stand on his own! Luckily the toilet broke his fall from falling all the way down! It still hurt and scared him but at least nothing is a lasting problem. Needless to say I FIRMLY told him he will NOT be allowed to stand without someone with him bathroom break or not!!! He was so restless the rest of the night....talking weird things...bad dreams...it was an exhausting night for me! I was so drained this morning!! After talking to the doctor...we are changing our course....Plans for today 1. stopping morphine switching to an oral pain med 2. MUST get things "flowing" :o) 3. MUST do his breathing exercises EVERY hour, He is getting some crackling sounds in his lungs 4. MUST have a standing/walking buddy! That said...I am glad my in-laws came in earlier today...I needed the break and a shower and change....I am decompressing! Breathe in....Breathe out.....awwww!

Until the next post.....

Loves...